May 12th, 2015. My husband had just arrived home from work as we were sitting around the dining room table when his cell phone rang. I observed his face as he replied, “Yes, this is he.” A smile stretched across his face as he made eye contact with me and finished with saying, “yep, she’s right here.” My stomach dropped wondering if it could really be the phone call. At this point we had been waiting 3 years to be parents and started the adoption process 7 months prior. We were warned that the waiting period to be matched with an expected mother could be quite some time, so the thought of getting a phone call just weeks after our official “adoption profile” was live for expectant mothers to view was hard to believe. But – there we were hearing the words: You’ve been chosen by an expectant mother, and she’d like to meet you.
November is National Adoption Awareness Month. Adoption can truly be summarized in one word: bittersweet. It’s never been lost on me the complexity of how we get to rejoice in being parents by someone else’s heartache. And still – after almost 10 years, I struggle to find the right words to express our gratitude for our son’s birth mom in choosing life and allowing us to be his parents.
At Precious Life, when we sit across from a woman contemplating how she wants to proceed with her pregnancy, adoption is always an option discussed, but it’s also one that seems so difficult for them to comprehend. The idea of “giving up their baby” feels like too much. And honestly, I don’t think this is a fact that any of us can deny. The idea of placing the child you carried for 9 months over to someone else to raise is truly difficult to comprehend and no doubt comes with immense heartache. But it’s one of the most selfless acts of love a mother can choose and an encouragement we provide to our clients who find themselves in these situations. An encouragement that even if parenting isn’t an option, that adoption might be hard to comprehend or heartbreaking but choosing life and adoption is far more loving than the alternative.
Adoption has been an absolute blessing to our lives. Not only did it allow us to become parents, we also get to have an amazing open adoption with some of our son’s birth family. Birthday cards, Christmas presents, visits with family, and allowing his first family to be part of ours. We’ve been blessed beyond measure with these relationships.
As Christians, isn’t it also such a blessing that we are chosen, called to be His, and adopted into God’s family! “He predestined us for adoption to Himself as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of His Will.” (Ephesians 1:5, ESV). This should spur each of us on to celebrate adoption! Our son’s life was worth saving and so glad his birth mom chose adoption for him. I pray that more people see the value and blessing that adoption can be.